01 September, 2011

Deceived and Delighting in it

Recently, I had occasion to speak with a friend's dad - this man who has had a tumultous, even abusive relationship with his son from the beginning. I knew, going in, that this was possibly a demonized man, and so had prayed for discernment.

As he spoke, it was as if he had behind him a wardrober FULL of different spirits - all evil - so that he was actually switching from one to the next to the next, changing spirits like cloaks, savoring each one as he would take on a different form, even if only momentarily. The activity seriously resembled insanity as he worked himself into a lather by the end of the conversation, putting on verbally violent theatrics, yelling and screaming like it brought him some deep, perverse pleasure. Which, knowing my own indulgences and susceptibility to temptation, it probably did just that.

I could "see" the spirits, but perhaps more powerfully, I was able, in brief glimpses, to see through to the man who desperately needs Jesus' deliverance. Between "costume changes," I saw a shriveled, weak, frail, broken man, like a survivor of the Holocaust - HIDING behind these spirits because he thought they EMPOWERED him, though they really ensnared him. But he LIKED being their slave. (I suppose as we all once did, before we were given the Spirit of Christ....!)

I saw his deception, and I saw his delight in it.

I wouldn't, yet, have the first idea about how to reach him - but I have recently had occasion to re-read the story in Mark 9 where Jesus tells his disciples that "This kind cannot come out except by praying and fasting." I would need to wait wholly on the Lord to empower me if I am to speak to the man, again.

For now, I was grateful for the "discernment" - I had prayed to the Lord specifically FOR it, but then also needed a couple days AFTER the conversation to "see" clearly what had transpired.

It is a helpful reminder (one I'll try to note for future interactions in a similar vein) that I NOT be overconfident in my own powers of observation, but rather 1) ask the Lord to reveal, and then 2) ask the Lord to SORT the revelation and impress the TRUTH to my understanding.

I do not know if the Lord will yet use me in this man's life, but as for the man's son, my friend, the Lord enabled me (at least!) to comprehend, better, some of the complexity of the influence this abuser has been. My friend has been engaged in full on warfare for his OWN sanity as a result; and he has been trying to "lay hold" of Christ, though he always feels salvation is beyond his grasp. I know I cannot be his assurance, but I long for it for him, nonetheless.

Trusting in God's goodness, that He has promised He will NOT lose any of His own....

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